What To Do When Your Husband Ignores You

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You’re sitting together on the couch and your husband is watching his favorite TV show. You’re trying to have an important conversation with him, but he just doesn’t seem to care what you have to say. He’s lost in his own little world.

Maybe there are a variety of different scenarios in which you feel like you’re trying to communicate with him, but he just never seems interested in your feelings. It hurts. I know.

I can guarantee that basically every woman has felt this way in her relationship/marriage at least once. It seems to be a very common thing actually. Men are pretty much known these days for being horrible listeners. Then, because they aren’t listening, we get on them about things and come across as a nagger/complainer.

It feels like we just can’t win right?

What if I told you that there are ways to get better communication with our men, no matter how impossible it may seem?

What if you could get your husband to WANT to listen help out with the things that you ask him to do? Or to sit and engage with you in conversation more?

He Does Care For You

Firstly, I want to put the reminder out there that if you and your husband are in a relationship where you both have mutual love for each other, but this has become an issue over time, know that he DOES care for you. Whether it may look like it or not.

It is in our nature as women to want to feel cared for and loved. We feel loved when our men listen, hold us, protect us and cherish us. And when they are not doing those things, we perceive it as them not loving us. And I will be the first to admit that there have been many times when I haven’t felt loved, so I start to pull away and get sad and angry. My pride clearly loves to take over during those times. In my mind I would think “Well, if he wants to act like that, then I won’t even bother trying, he doesn’t care anyway”, or if he’d try talking to me, I’d show with my actions that I am angry with him.

Can you see either of these ways of responding as a healthy solution to the problem? Yeah, me neither. But, if I were to change, and respond differently, wouldn’t that just be better for him? What would I get out of it? Well, let’s look a little deeper at what is going on.

 

He Could Be Stressed Out

Instead of putting the blame on us, by saying that he’s not listening because he doesn’t care for you, let’s try a different approach.

One thing I have learned from my husband over these years is that men process stress differently than women. They tend to need time to themselves to process their emotions in a healthy way. A lot of us women are wired in a way where we need to talk out our feelings in order to get through them. So naturally, we expect everyone else to do the same.

He could be dealing with a ton of stress at work, trying to handle the pressure of providing for his family, worrying about being a good husband and/or father, and maybe hasn’t been getting proper sleep. Imagine going through all of those things, but never talking to anyone about them, trying to push through everyday without acknowledging the issues at hand. Just trying to stay strong for the people around you.

Personally, I would go insane. Once I realized everything that my husband has had on his plate while still trying to be the rock in our home, I really started gaining a better appreciation for him and what he does, which was slowly helping me see things differently.

 

He May Have No Idea What You Actually Need

What do I mean by this? Well, another nifty thing that I learned from my husband is that, men don’t always know HOW we want them to listen. There were times where I would sit and talk to my husband about something that happened to me, and he wouldn’t say much in response. I thought he just never had any interest in what I had to say. But, after talking with him about it, I found out that he was always listening, but he didn’t know that I needed any sort of response from him. He thought he was doing the right thing by letting me vent. Or he would try to find a solution for the issue, rather than just being there and comforting me like I wanted him to.

Maybe you’re in a situation where your husband barely ever makes eye contact with you when you are speaking. He just seems to be wrapped up in his work or what is on the television. He may still be hearing every word you are saying, but because he is not giving you his full attention, it seems like he is not making you a priority.

For me, I need confirmation and reassurance of my feelings on things when I am speaking. But he didn’t know this because I never brought it up to him. This is where we started realizing that we needed to work on our communication. We do things very differently, and have different needs. And that is okay! It’s really good and healthy actually, and gives it’s own little way of glorifying God, which I will get to shortly.

 

He May Feel Disrespected

Just like how we as women long to feel loved and desired by our husbands, men long to be respected and appreciated by their wives. When we feel a lack of love by our husband, our natural instinct may be to take back our respect. We might go silent when they want to speak with us, put them down, be passive aggressive, or roll our eyes when they’re speaking.

When men feel a lack of respect from their wives, their natural response is usually to get angry. They’re human too, so they do have the right to their feelings. And when you are angry, do you feel like being loving?

You may have been unknowingly treating him in ways that he feels are disrespectful, and has been pulling away as a response. Some things that we may do without realizing could be:

  • Telling him what to do/how to do it
  • Having a critical spirit and putting him down the things he tries to do
  • Joking at his expense
  • Complaining about something that he spent time doing for you
  • Bringing up past sins that have already been forgiven
  • Answering for him

These things can set a man off and make him feel insulted and disrespected.

 

He May Not Be Ready To Talk About It

Some men, my husband included, need time to think about weighty topics. We tend to want to talk with our husbands RIGHT then and there when something comes to our minds. But a lot of times, men need some time to reflect on what the problem is so that they can respond properly.

There have been times where I would just come out of nowhere trying to have a very important conversation with my husband. It would be in the heat of the moment, and normally it was when I was in the height of my emotions. I would be asking questions and putting him on the spot. He would try to answer, but quickly get stressed out.

He would tell me that he needed some time to think about it. I used to think that he just didn’t want to talk about the problem, so he was trying to put it off. But after bringing it up to him, he explained to me that he legitimately just needs some time to gather his thoughts in those moments.

So, after looking at why he may not be listening, and seeing that it most likely has nothing to do with his lack of love for you, let’s see what can be done about it.

 

Set Up Appropriate Times for Important Conversations

In the beginning of our relationship, I used to get angry about something that I was thinking about while my then boyfriend was at work. I would immediately text him this  text about something he did and why I was upset with him. I would accuse him of things that I wasn’t sure he even did yet. Ladies, DON’T DO THIS. The worst time to start an argument is over the phone because it doesn’t get properly solved. Then he gets stressed out at work, while you’re just building up resentment because he isn’t getting back to you quick enough.

If you want to make sure that your husband is ALL there when you want to have an important conversation, let him know in advance that you’d like to talk with him about something on your heart. Not a demand of “We NEED to talk later” and then leaving him to guess what he did wrong. Instead, invite him in to speak with you. If he has done something that you’re angry about, express your anger to God, and ask Him to help you speak to your husband in love. Then, go for a run, write in a journal, whatever you have to do to have a clear mind when you speak to him.

When it is time to talk, and if he seems distracted, let him know that this talk is important to you and you’d like if he would give you the same courtesy that you are giving to him. No finger pointing, eye-rolling or “see, you ALWAYS do this!”. Again, you want to invite him in for a conversation with you, not demand it. He will be much more likely to respond the way you would like him to if you show respect. (I mean, you wouldn’t want him acting like that with you right?)

 

Give Him Space

If lately he has been spending all of his time either working or with you during his free time, it might be time to give him some space. He may not say it because he doesn’t want to hurt you, but every man needs his space once in a while just to think and do..nothing! It might not make sense to us, but those times for them are precious.

So, if he seems to be extra quiet lately, or distracted when you try to speak to him, try suggesting that he take some time to watch his favorite show, play a game or whatever it is he likes doing. I guarantee he will appreciate this so much and will come back recharged, ready and WANTING to hear what you have to say.

When I started doing this with my husband, he felt that I respected him and his needs. He would actually include me into his activities and talk with me while playing his games.

So, it may sound counter intuitive to have him go off and do his thing when you want to talk with him, but in reality, it will have him wanting to make you happy in the way you desire in the end without you having to try to get his attention.

 

Tell Him What You Need

When you’re talking with him, if he is looking at his phone or is barely engaging back with you, now is the time to let him know what makes you feel loved. Now, this is not meant to be an effort to make him feel guilty, and point out everything he has been doing wrong.

Let him know that when he is looking at other things while you are talking, it makes you feel unwanted and not a priority. Use phrases like “I feel that..” instead of “You make me angry when you..”. Having an accusatory tone does nothing but put the other person on the defense. But when we use phrases like the first one, it shows them that we are simply explaining our feelings about something that is happening. He may have no idea that you are feeling hurt by his actions, because it may be something that he’s been doing for years or even grew up doing, and there was never an issue before.

Men love to fix things. Not just tangible things, but I mean everything. They do actually want to fix whatever issue is making you upset. So, if you let them know in a loving, non-accusatory way, they will want to change their behaviors for you because they want to know that they are making their lady happy.

 

Let Him Know That You Appreciate Him

If you know that you’ve both been at each other a lot lately. Or maybe you’ve been doing some of the things I mentioned earlier that can be a sign of disrespect to a husband. Try telling him what you appreciate about him more often. I know, this can be hard when we’re upset, maybe you don’t feel like he deserves for you to tell him those things right now.

Ask God to help you see your husband through His eyes. I have had to do this quite a few times in the past. I knew there were so many amazing things about him, but during those moments where I was hurt, it was hard to come up with any. But, sure enough, God would give me peace and help me to see my husband in a new light. And now, I take every opportunity I can to let him know how proud I am of him and how much I appreciate everything he does for us.

The more you show him your appreciation and respect, the more he will search for ways to show you love. You may still need to let him know how you would like for him to engage with you during conversations, but going into a talk when both people are feeling loved and appreciated makes communication that much better.

Conclusion

I want to put this out there. I am not condoning acting in certain ways just so that you can get something in return. I believe that marriage should not be 50/50 but 100/100. Giving your all to each other. Not just meeting half way and waiting for the other person to do what you want them to. If we allow God to fill us and meet our needs, then we can pour out our love and respect for each other selflessly.

Like I said in the beginning, I guarantee your husband loves and cares for you very much. You just have different love languages and ways of doing things. This is why communication is SO important. So that you can learn what those things are and respond in ways that will make your marriage stronger, healthier and happier.

I hope you enjoyed reading and were able to get some helpful tips. Thanks so much for stopping by! Don’t forget to subscribe to get updated on new posts and freebies!

20 Ways to Keep Your Marriage Strong

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I’ve put together a list of things that I have learned over the years of developing a godly relationship, that can help to keep a relationship healthy and strong.

I am by no means saying that my relationship with my husband is perfect. In fact, I am sharing this list with you because we’ve been at some pretty low places in our relationship where we weren’t even sure we would stay together. But these are things that we have learned and put into practice from reading books, articles, and watching videos on Godly marriage and relationships. And we saw for ourselves how much these things can make a difference and really change things around for the best!

We still don’t get it right all the time, and our sinful nature likes to take over, but when we do our best to apply these things, and bring every situation to God, our relationship gets stronger in the end.

So without further ado…here are 20 ways to keep your marriage strong!

  1. Never leave without saying “I love you”
  2. Don’t leave without a kiss (Even if you’re angry with each other, it is a way to let the other know that you still care for them in that moment regardless of emotions)
  3. Don’t speak badly about him/her to anyone including family and close friends. Don’t vent to others when you are in a fight. Bring it to God, and He will give you the peace and answers you need. (Sometimes other people can make matters worse because they naturally want to side with you but it may make you feel worse about the situation. And they may end up having a lasting negative feeling toward your spouse even after the fight is over and you’ve made up)
  4. If he does something kind (like washing the dishes after dinner), but doesn’t do it the way you would (doesn’t rinse or dry them off right away), show him that you appreciate his kind deed regardless, and try not to bring up what he could’ve done better.
  5. Say “thank you” OFTEN. Whenever he/she does something kind or thoughtful, let them know that you appreciate it, it is nice to hear. (Especially if it is their love language) Don’t just assume that he/she knows.
  6. Protect your minds and hearts, and don’t watch or listen to anything ungodly. Fill  your home with things that are of God: “whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is purewhatever is lovely, whatever is admirable — if anything is excellent or praiseworthy — think about such things and the God of peace will be with you” (Philippians 4:8)
  7. This one goes back to #3 but a little more specific and I feel is so important. Do not talk about your marital issues with those of the opposite sex, as it gives the wrong idea and can mess with your emotions. Again, take it to God. What happens between you and your husband/wife isn’t everyone else’s business. This is a great way to show respect to each other, and yourself.
  8. Let them have space when they need it. Ladies, a lot of us could spend every second of every day with our man, trust me I KNOW. But what I’ve come to learn is that men aren’t exactly wired the way we are. Sometimes they just need some time to chill and do their own thing for a while. It doesn’t mean they hate us. A lot of times it helps them to think better and process all of the many emotions they tend to hold in.

I just want to throw this in there. My husband has 2 days off during the week and the rest of the time works the overnight shift. So, naturally I try to get in every bit of time I can with him. For a long time, I would get upset when he didn’t want to spend every second with me. I took it as him not caring about our time together, or just wanting to be away from me. But once I learned how men tend to process things, I realized that it is necessary and healthy for him to take this time. And usually, he wants me by his side when he is playing his game so that we can hold hands, but just be doing separate things. Most of the time, he actually talks with me about what is going on in his game and wants me somewhat included, so that’s always nice! So, we started intentionally setting aside a few hours on one of his days off to do this.

9. Listen to him. And I mean REALLY listen. Even if you couldn’t give a rip about the things he/she is into, it shows that you care about them and their love for those things and I guarantee it will mean the world to them.

10. If something that you do bothers or upsets him/her, don’t put them down for feeling that way. Even if you don’t agree that he/she should be bothered, they deserve respect just as much as you do. So saying things like “wow, that seriously bothers you?” or “a real man wouldn’t be upset about that”, are big no-nos.

11. FLIRT. Touch him/her. And I don’t just mean in a sexual way. Brushing your hand over his back. Playing with her hair. Grabbing his hand when you’re walking together. Coming up behind her and putting your arms around her. Little ways to show affection and let the other person know that you love being in their presence.

12. Support each other through everything.

13. Be each other’s biggest cheerleader whenever something great happens in the other’s life.

14. Greet him/her enthusiastically. Show them how much you missed them!

15. Talk about problems as they arise. Don’t hold them in and let them build. If things start to get too heated between you two, let the other person know that you just need a minute to cool down and you will be back so you can both figure things out. And then go into the other room, go for a drive, whatever you need to clear your head, and get in prayer. This will help you both so you’re not coming at each other with pure anger and can see things with a better perspective.

16. Pray with each other as often as possible. It is a special thing when your spouse raises you up in prayer. It is a beautiful way to love on someone.

17. Have a date night once a week if possible. It doesn’t even have to cost money. Even if it is just you two ordering your favorite pizza and having a movie marathon together. Just something to take your minds off of the stresses of the week and just focus on each other and spending time together.

18. Put the phone away when you’re with each other. Phones can literally ruin relationships. Ours did at one point a while back. There was a time when both my husband and I would be scrolling through Facebook while right next to each other, not saying a word. Then there were times when one of us would be using our phones while the other felt left out and unwanted. Trust me, I understand that this is a habit for most of us. We’re used to everyone being glued to their phones. But honestly, being on your phone when you’re with friends or family is a bit rude. So, it is the same with your spouse. It took us a bit to completely get rid of this habit, but now we never go on our phones other than to check the time or weather. And we get to enjoy and really embrace every moment together. You only get so much time with one another, so make the most of it!

19. Let your spouse know how proud you are of them. Often.

20. Encourage and verbally acknowledge the good things about your spouse. Speak life into them daily. Let them know that you see how hard they work and you admire that about them. How gifted they are in a certain area. How big of a heart they have. Even if they aren’t doing things perfectly or to what you think their potential is, the more life you speak into them, the more they will want to become even more of the amazing person you see them as.

 

That’s all I’ve got for now! I hope some of these were helpful. Again, we don’t do these perfectly all the time, but I just know from experience that the times when we do apply these, our relationship just gets much stronger and they get easier to do over time.

I wish you all the best with your relationships! Let me know in the comments what you think and if you do any or most of these and how it has affected your relationships!

What is Love?

“Love” is such a common word we hear and use isn’t it?

The dictionary definition of “love is:

  1. (noun) an intense feeling of deep affection.

  2. (noun) a great interest and pleasure in something.

  3. (verb) feel a deep romantic or sexual attachment to someone

 

We use it a lot when expressing our appreciation or enjoyment of something.

“I LOVE the Chalupas from TacoBell!”

“I LOVE the way you did your hair”

“I LOVE that shirt”

…..you get it.

 

Basically, “love” according to this definition is a feeling, right? An intense feeling toward something.

Now, let’s just throw this out there..if a man and a woman are dating, and the man swears at, belittles, and regularly insults the woman, but states that he loves her, then according to this definition, we can’t exactly say whether he does or not. Because love is just a feeling, and we can’t claim to know someone else’s feelings regardless of whether it shows through their actions or not. 

So, this woman continues to allow that man to treat her that way because she believes that he loves her and doesn’t want to mess that up.

That doesn’t sound good right? Obviously, any other person would say that the man doesn’t love her because his actions prove otherwise. Also, the woman isn’t truly showing love by enabling the man to treat her with such wrong actions, right? She may be reacting out of fear, being used to the relationship and not wanting to try over, or maybe he does offer some positive things to her life that she doesn’t want to lose. So, in a case like this, the actions of both don’t indicate love, but the supposed feelings do.

Well, let’s think about another, more regular occurrence, based on actions and feelings not lining up…

Let’s say a couple got married 1 year ago, and they’ve been getting into more fights since they started living together. We’ll bring in a specific argument, and you decide whether the actions are loving or not.

The husband has been taking on extra work and stressing out lately because they are planning to have a child and he wants to be able to provide. Because of this, he has been distant lately, trying to figure things out. He hasn’t been affectionate, spends most of his free time in front of the tv, and they haven’t gone on a date in a couple of months. The wife takes her husband’s distance as him not caring about her or wanting to spend time with her, so she gets angry and resentful. Her husband comes home one day and tries to speak with her about her day, but because she has been holding in all of her pain, she just says “fine” in an angry tone and then walks away into the other room. Her husband is left wondering what he did wrong, which adds to the stress he already has, and is upset because he doesn’t want his wife to hurt, but she won’t speak to him.

In this situation, we see some unloving actions all throughout right? And both the husband and wife feeling unloved as well. But isn’t this a situation we may even go through ourselves often? The man/woman you’re with upsets you deeply with their actions and you don’t FEEL love towards them for the moment. You feel angry, upset, disappointed, maybe even unloved yourself. You don’t feel butterflies, happiness and lovey-dovey during those moments.

If these types of actions and feelings continue for too long, that is usually where people start to say “I don’t think I am in love with them anymore”, I think we need to end things. “In love” is just yet another way of saying “have deep feelings for”.

So, many relationships are based on feelings for each other, and once those feelings are gone and aren’t seeming to change anytime soon, that is when people decide to call it off. And some may say they “love” someone, but their actions clearly prove otherwise. Therefore, can we maybe consider that this popular definition of love being a feeling, doesn’t have any real value? It doesn’t benefit anyone or even mean anything most of the time.

Many of us say “words don’t mean anything, I need to see actions”. And rightfully so.

Feelings come and go, CONSTANTLY. We are all imperfect human beings who can’t be what everyone wants us to be. Therefore, we will upset people that we care deeply for. We won’t always get along with people. That’s just how it is. That doesn’t mean you care about those people any less, it just means you’re human.

Now, let’s look at the Bible’s meaning of love for a second:

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

 

Personally, I like this definition a lot better. It gives us something to work towards. Something that is actually practical for our lives and relationships.

See, love isn’t just accepting people’s wrong doing towards us, or pushing through toxic relationships, that is not healthy for anyone and is a whole other situation that needs to be handled.

Love is choosing to show these qualities even during times when we don’t feel like it. When it is the hardest to do so. Anyone can be kind when someone else is being kind. Anyone can be patient when there’s nothing testing your patience. Anyone can exercise hope, when there’s much to be hopeful for. Anyone can persevere when things are going wonderfully. But love is choosing to do those things even when we DON’T feel like it. Not withholding love when we’re sad, because we chose to love this person and they are God’s creation. Withholding our love because of emotions is (I’m going to be blunt here) selfish.

I am not going to sit here and pretend I haven’t done this myself. I most definitely have reacted more times than I would like to admit based on my feelings. And have withdrawn and been unloving. We all do it. But the problem comes when we think we are entitled to behaving this way and even use our feelings as a way to justify those behaviors.

Not being “in love” with someone anymore means nothing. Because you can easily fall back “in love” again in a few hours. So, the more that we study this biblical definition of love and make the choice to do those things even when we’re at our worst, the closer we are getting to Christ, and the stronger our relationships will be. I am not saying it is going to be easy in the slightest. In fact, you’re going to mess up at times, and you may feel like giving up often. But, it is beyond worth it. When you’re having a hard time, bring it to God, let Him give you the strength to keep showing love.

Again, there is much more involved when it comes to abusive and toxic relationships, and you may need to go speak with someone to help you more in depth, but this goes for any normally healthy friendships and relationships that may be going through hard times. Or if you’re just confused about what love actually is, or if it has been losing it’s meaning to you lately, I hope that this can help you a bit.

 

I hope you enjoyed reading this post. If you have any questions or would like to comment on it, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Don’t forget to subscribe to be updated on future posts.

 

Not the wedding I dreamed of…

I honestly never used to picture what my wedding would be like until social media became a thing. All of those picturesque, fairy-tale like scenes on Pinterest. The big, flowy ball gowns with diamonds and jewels throughout, perfectly fitted on beautiful brides to look like princesses.

Every venue was just gorgeous, packed with hundreds (sometimes thousands) of guests, loads of decorations neatly and precisely placed, and professional photographers who could capture each moment perfectly.

The more I saw these pictures and heard the stories, the more I wanted it for myself.

I created my own Wedding board on Pinterest and got to work! I added the exact bouquet I wanted, the color theme, MY dress that I NEEDED to have in order to even consider getting married, and tons of pictures of rustic barns because nothing else could possibly do.

This was all before I was engaged. Before Stephen and I even spoke about engagement actually. But it was what I knew needed to happen in order for me to be a happy bride one day.

Once Stephen did propose to me, you better believe I immediately started planning all the little details of our wedding.

Ring pic

The thing I started realizing? In order to get the Pinterest wedding I always wanted, we would have to go into debt…a LOT of it. And, even while just in the beginning stages on planning, we were already getting extremely stressed out. I wanted to get married the next year, but with everything we needed to do and the money we needed to save, it would have to be put off for much longer.

I was so conflicted. I prayed every day about it. I wanted to have a beautiful wedding, something I would be happy with. This was MY day! But, as the days were passing, my desire to marry the man God had for me grew stronger.

Each day I prayed, it seemed that I wanted the big, fancy wedding less and less. I began to realize that maybe my desire for it was based on what society says is “ideal”, and not what I truly wanted after all.

I asked myself “what do I want right now”? All that kept coming to me was “To marry Stephen and start a family together.”

So, I thought about it..If we were to put this off and invest all of our money into a one-day celebration that will be over in just a few hours, then we wouldn’t be able to start our family for quite a few years. We wouldn’t be able to save for a house. We would probably be extremely stressed out during the planning and the day of, that we wouldn’t remember half of what happened that day.

We would be more concerned with our guests than our first precious moments as husband and wife.

Now, please don’t take this as me putting down anyone who chooses to have a big wedding. We still plan to have one ourselves one day as a vow renewal! If you have the money and patience to plan it, go for it! It will be amazing.

But for us personally, we are both very simple people. We don’t need much. Nor do we really want much more than what we have. And this was a realization I am truly glad God brought me to. I realized…this wedding isn’t about ME, its about Him and our coming together as one for HIM.

The crazy thing is, I didn’t exactly bring it up to Stephen. He actually brought it up to me. He threw out the possibility (he says he was half-serious, not sure what I would say about it), “what if we just got married this weekend”?

At the time, we had been having a bit of an argument because I was stressed about it all and we both just wanted to be married already. I wasn’t sure whether to take what he said seriously, but I honestly didn’t care anymore, I ended up agreeing to it. So, he said we would make it happen.

I was in shock that we were actually going to be doing this! But as time got closer and closer, it just felt right and everything fell into place perfectly.

I will say, it took a bit longer than that weekend, but each day we were taking care of something for our special day. We got our birth certificates, then our marriage license. Then the next day we went and got our wedding rings and told our parents. We somehow got the perfect officiant to help us with our vows.

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I found a beautiful dress that fit my personality to a T. And my family was able to make up some decorations to make our little ceremony special. We invited only our immediate family. This one was difficult at first since we wanted our close friends to be apart of our special day, but they were all very understanding.

So, we got our wedding planned out within a week and a half! Throughout that whole week, Stephen and I were praising God for His goodness and blessing our relationship. He was moving things along for us to make this happen. I knew it was all meant to be this way.

 

The ceremony was beautiful. It was done at a nearby park in front of an archway that my parents set up in the perfect spot, right near the water fountain. I asked my sister and sister-in-law to use their photography skills and capture each moment. We got to focus on our love and devotion to God and each other, while our family was there to witness it. Then after saying our goodbyes, we headed off to our gorgeous hotel for the night.

Not much about our wedding was traditional, or anything like what I thought I wanted years ago…it was even better! It was more “us” than anything else we could have had. To us it was genuine, elegant, simple, and not so crazy stressful! And now we can do exactly what we have been wanting for a while now, to start our own family and glorify God through our marriage.

I write this not only to share with you a bit about how our special day was, but for anyone who may be considering a small ceremony themselves, to know that it can be just as special and beautiful as any Pinterest wedding. Everyone is different, with unique priorities and desires for life. Go with what makes you and your future spouse happy. Don’t listen to what everyone else wants for you or thinks would be best. If you stick to what makes you feel best, you will have zero regrets and be so glad you did it!

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Thank you so much for stopping by and reading! I hope you enjoyed my little story and maybe got something out of it for yourself. I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments. What kind of wedding are you planning on having?

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